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My wife asked me to buy some "organic" vegetables from our local supermarket.
I walked up and down the aisles for ages and couldn't find any, so I thought I'd ask one of the staff.
There was a very old and tired looking employee filling the shelves, so I enquired, "These vegetables are for my wife. Have they been sprayed with any poisonous chemicals?"
The old guy looked at me and said, "No, you'll have to do that yourself."