Male Chauvinist Pigs FAQ's
- Q. What is worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
A. A woman that won't do as she is told.
- Q. How many men does it take to open a beer?
A. None. It should be opened when she brings it to you.
- Q. Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
A. Because a woman who can't afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
- Q. Why do women have smaller feet than men?
A. It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
- Q. How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
A. When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me..."
- Q. How do you fix a woman's watch?
A. You don't. They don't need one. There's a clock on the oven.
- Q. If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
A. The dog of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
- Q. What food have scientists discovered that diminishes a woman's sex drive.
A. Yes, it's Wedding Cake.
- Q. Why do men die before their wives?
A. The simple answer is because they want to.
- Q. Will women ever be equal to men?
A. Not until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
Now that I've offended nearly every women on the planet, here's a nice kitchen knife set you might like to buy?