Marooned On A Desert Island
A man marooned on a desert island looks out to sea and sees a shape in the water. As its gets nearer he sees a swimmer coming towards the shore.
A beautiful woman emerges in a wet suit. He says, "Am I glad to see you. I've been here for 10 years and I'm desperate for a cigarette."
She unzips a pocket in her shoulder and brings out a packet of cigarettes and a lighter and lights one up for him. As he takes a few drags on it he says, "I really fancy an ice cold beer."
She unzips a pocket on her thigh and brings out a can and hands it to him.
She then says, as she seductively unzips the front of her wetsuit,"Now I'm really going to give you something you've been missing for the last 10 years."
"Bloody hell," he says, "You haven't got a football in there as well have you?"