Bad Motorway Driving
Driving to work this morning in the fast lane of the motorway, I looked over to my left and there was this woman in a brand new Jaguar doing just 50 mph, with her face right up to the rear view mirror putting on her eyeliner.
I looked away for a couple of seconds and when I looked back, she was halfway over into my lane, still working on that makeup.
As a man, I don't scare easily but she scared me so much that:-
I dropped my electric shaver, which knocked the toast out of my other hand. In all the confusion of trying to straighten out the car using my knees against the steering wheel, it knocked my mobile phone away from my ear, which fell into the coffee between my legs, splashed and soaked my trousers, ruined the phone and disconnected a very important call.
Damn Those Stupid Women Drivers!